The clock, ticking. This is what the female biological imperative to reproduce is described as when it is manifest in the consciousness of the being. The desire to produce offspring.
Men get that too.
Approaching the 3o year mark, seeing it rise up ahead of me, I’m reminded of the time left to me. Also seeing the children of my friends. Their youthfulness, their joys and sorrows. Holding, really holding a baby (Thanks Clair for being such a good kid)… tick tick.
I’ve been told by others that know me well that I would make a great father. This used to frighten me because I did not believe it myself. Now this is more of an encouragement.
There are many ways to become a father. But I would want to do the parenting with a partner, my partner and wife. This person whom I may not know yet, but who is somehow the most important person in my life.
Keep your eye out for me, and I will look for you.
~RyeNCode~
I’m going to see Muse & Silversun Pickups live here in the (nearby) city where I live.
I’m super excited, but not just for myself. I’ve invited 3 of my favorite friends that I know will also greatly enjoy the show. That is what makes me most excited.
I wouldn’t want to go if I couldn’t share it with people who are important to me.
I have a couple of extra tickets too for SOs or other people. Aren’t I thoughtful?
~ RyeNCode ~
Everyone needs a listener. Someone to talk to who listens. Listens to you when you are happy and when you are sad. Listens when you have nothing to say, or everything. The listener is not there to judge, but will give opinions when asked or needed. The listener is trusted to keep what is said private. The listener might not agree but it is not their job to agree or disagree… but to listen.
I’m a listener.
This is not an easy role to play. It sounds passive and uncomplicated. People who have not listened could think that you just sit and hear words spoken… walk away when done. But hearing is not listening. Listening require understanding and empathy. You must be able to imagine yourself in the speaker’s shoes, feel what they feel. Their pain, their joy becomes yours.
This is an emotionally taxing role to play. It is more so when you yourself have any kind of emotional investment in the speaker. Friends, family, enemies, role models, ex-boy/girlfriends and crushes. Trying to be more or less objective is near impossible.
Why do I do this? It is because it is who I am. For my friends I will be a listener. I believe it enriches their lives to be able to speak freely, without fear of judgement. It has a cathartic quality, getting things off your chest, speaking your thoughts out loud to someone can help you see a situation more clearly. Echoing back what was said can clear up confusion and misunderstandings. Truths you did not know that you knew become evident.
I also have listeners. Not one, but many. For reasons best left unsaid, I cannot fully confide in any one listener. So I have more than one. Across them, I can approach near full disclosure. But the desire for a Full Listener there… the one you can and do tell everything to.
Keeping my eye out, and ears open.
~RyeNCode~